Edward Bulwer-Lytton Strikes Again

“It was a dark and stormy night; the rain fell in torrents—except at occasional intervals, when it was checked by a violent gust of wind which swept up the streets (for it is in London that our scene lies), rattling along the housetops, and fiercely agitating the scanty flame of the lamps that struggled against the darkness.”

Thus began Edward Bulwer-Lytton’s 1830 novel, Paul Clifford. The book has been maligned as an archetypal example of bad writing, with its florid phrases and purple prose. But, in my opinion, it stands up as a novel…at least by 19th-century standards.

Still, over time, that introductory phrase–“It was a dark and stormy night”–became a trope for hack writing, a meme before memes were a thing. It was maligned in Charles Schultz’s “Peanuts” comic strip in the 1970s. In 2009 a movie by that name was released by Larry Blaimore, the man who brought us the inimicable “Lost Skeleton of Cadavra.” (And I actually do recommend that film.) Oh, and inevitably there came to be an annual contest poking fun at Bulwer-Lytton’s opening line. So, it’s well established that “Dark and Stormy Night” is a thing. And not a very good thing.

But for our purposes, “It was a dark and stormy night” sets a stereotypical Halloween scene. Think of the “Old Dark House” movies, which include, of course, the classic film starring Boris Karloff from 1932, and a 1963 remake starring Tom Poston (who you’ll remember from “Newhart”). Maybe next year’s October theme should be ODH movies…

So if it hasn’t been made clear already, today’s cocktail is something called a “Dark and Stormy.” It’s a well-established drink, based on dark rum. I wouldn’t necessarily call it a Halloween drink, but the name does give it a reason to appear on our list.

The recipe: It’s simplicity itself. Combine 2 oz dark rum, 3 oz ginger beer, and 1/2 oz lime juice into an ice-filled glass. Stir, drink, and enjoy.

The ratings: I have to confess that this is the first time I’ve tried a Dark and Story. And I was pleasantly surprised. It’s one of the more drinkable rum-based drinks that I’ve encountered.

It’s appearance leads with a nice, honey-colored hue. The darkness of the rum is ameliorated a bit by the ginger beer, but it would be easy to darken it a shade with a heavier proportion of dark rum. Or maybe even add a bit of dark molasses? Sadly, there was no molasses in the house, so I wasn’t able to test this theory. In its basic incarnation, I can’t give it more than 2 points.

The taste is awesome! The substance and potency of the dark rum is nicely balanced by the ginger beer. The lime juice prevents the drink from being too cloying. It’s remarkably easy to drink. In fact, I was able to throw three of these back with no problem at all. Though perhaps that’s an indication of other concerns… Anyway, this is fully deserving of the full 4 points.

Frankly, the name is the only reason this drink is on our list this month. But what an evocative, moody name it is! It fully deserves the full 2 points.

Grand Total: 8 out of 10 points.

I think, in the background over the rest of this month, I’m going to experiment with some variations on the Dark and Stormy. I just tried adding a bit of coffee liqueur, but that didn’t do much for me. I think I’ll try adding Kahlua, molasses, more dark rum, and/or some imperial stout. I’ll keep you posted on developments. Or experiment yourself and let me know what you come up with!