Advent Spirit Day 5: Painted Stave Bourbon

You know, all these little 50 ml bottles are almost perfect miniature versions of the full-size bottles, with the same general shape and the same labeling and, of course, the same spirit visible through the glass or plastic. But the giveaway is the cap, which is grotesquely out of proportion with the bottle. It’s comically huge and clunky and destroys the illusion. We can put a man on the moon, and yet no one has yet figured out how to do a cap or cork to proper scale?

Such was my chain of thought when I removed today’s spirit from its Advent Drawer. And that spirit is Painted Stave Bourbon Whiskey.

Now, I know what you’re thinking: Another bourbon? And the answer is, technically, yes, but this one seems to be going out of its way to be different. For starters, it’s not made in Kentucky but rather Delaware, a state known more for soybeans than whiskey. Second, it uses an unusually high proportion of rye. (Recall that to make a bourbon, over half of the grain used must be corn. For most bourbons, about 10 percent is rye. Painted Stave uses 26 percent.) Third, there’s that purple label. In my experience, almost all bourbons use dark or muted colors, to evoke age and solid stability and no-nonsense tradition. This label looks like it belongs on a bottle of Fabuloso.

Anyway, here’s the blurb from their website:

“Painted Stave Delaware Style Bourbon is rested in new, charred American oak for at least six years and represents Delaware’s first Bourbon from Delaware’s first craft distillery. We distill a mash of Corn, Rye and Malted Barley (66:26:8) and age for at least 6 years in heavily charred barrels for a bold whiskey flavor. It is then bottled at 94 proof in house. Its nose presents Vanilla, Caramel, Spice, Apple, and Spiced Cookie notes, with hints Oak. In the mouth one finds corn sweetness, that give way to dry spicy notes of cinnamon, raisin, and white pepper.”

All that remains now is for us to try a shot of the stuff. Here ‘goes.

Appearance: This looks a little richer or darker than yesterday’s bourbon. I’d call it an orangish copper, kind of like the poorly-dyed hair of the lady who worked at the Rexall down the street from us when I was growing up.

Aroma: There’s something very fruity about the aroma of this bourbon. I get apples and currants that had been stored in the pantry next to the Duncan Hines vanilla cake mix and then placed on your patio table under a hot summer sun.

Taste: This is really hot and spicy. I might even go so far as to say hot ‘n’ spicy. Some spice is to be expected with so much rye, but this comes across more like cayenne. There’s also an astringent quality that reminds me of rubbing alcohol. That might be good for cleaning an abrasion, but I’m not convinced it works as a drink.

Finish: A few years back I had a colonoscopy. And readers of a certain age know what it’s like to drink the “prep,” which is positively disgusting. You have to knock back like a couple of liters of the stuff over the course of an evening. When you finally finish the last gulp, you are exhausted but relieved. You’ve gotten past the worst of it.

That’s what the finish on this bourbon is like.

Bottom Line: The Delawareans should stick to soybeans.