That headline has multiple meanings for today’s post.

First, just to get this out of the way, I did not receive the Saturday ‘Visiter’ Award last night at Poe Fest’s Black Cat Ball. But I’m pleased to report the award went to a worthy recipient: Sherrill Joseph has been writing a book series aimed at a youth audience that features a group of young investigators that evokes the Hardy Boys. The fifth book of her series is centered on Edgar Allan Poe, and it garnered the award. I spent much of the day yesterday with Sherrill and her daughter Nicole, and I couldn’t be more pleased that she won.

So, before we move on to the Treat of the Day, permit me to share a few photos from last night’s Black Cat Ball.

OK, now let’s move from one not-a-slam-dunk to another.

Across the street from my hotel (the historic Lord Baltimore Hotel) was a Dunkin’ [Donuts]. I immediately recalled the delicious Spider Donut that I reviewed a couple of years ago. Could I experience the magic again?

Alas, the Spider Donut has crawled off Dunkin’s menu. The only “fall treat” they had on offer was a Pumpkin Muffin. Resignedly, I took the muffin and walked back to the hotel lobby to conduct this review.

Conceptual Soundness: C’mon. It’s an unadorned pumpkin muffin. It’s not a complicated concept, but neither is it especially interesting. 2 points.

Appearance of the Treat: Unlike the Starbucks muffin that I reviewed a few days ago, this is deeply cracked and misshapen. It looks like the unholy spawn of a bear claw and a Soufflé. The color is reasonably pumpkin-y, but I suspect the presence of food coloring. There’s no cream cheese or pepitas or anything to make this muffin special. They couldn’t even be bothered to use a seasonally-appropriate orange muffin cup. 1 point.

Taste: The taste is actually pretty good. There’s a slight pumpkin flavor, and it’s sweet, but not to the point of cloying. Unlike some grocery store muffins, this has no artificial or off taste.

The cake is very moist, to the point of being almost soggy. It would have benefited from another couple of minutes in the oven. The top has none of that slight crusting that I find so satisfying to bite through. Instead, the whole muffin just kind of collapses on contact. But then, somehow, each bite of this overly moist muffin ends with a dry, desiccated, crumbly finish. It seems to defy the laws of baking physics.

Overall, despite the decent taste, the eating experience is fatally compromised. The mouthfeel just doesn’t work, and the unadorned cake is so homogeneous that you’re sick of it by the time you finish. This is why breakfast cereals have crunch berries or marshmallow moons or whatever. 1 point.

Value: I paid $2.75 for this is downtown Baltimore. The price compares favorably to the Starbucks cream cheese muffin ($3.95). But you’ll recall that was a delicious treat; this is not. I’ll score the value at 2 points.

Total Treat Score: 6/16 points.

Now it’s time to leave Baltimore and say goodbye to Poe Fest. Tomorrow our seasonal treat focus will shift to Halloween candy.