Appley Ever After

Attentive readers will recall my fond memory of receiving a popcorn ball one Halloween during my misspent youth. From that same general time I also remember another homemade treat: my mom’s caramel apples. They were a pretty simple affair that involved the dipping of skewered apples into a saucepan containing melted Kraft caramels. I seldom would wait for the caramel to harden; in fact, I scarcely waited for its temperature to drop into double digits. My technique was to scrape off the caramel coating with my teeth, and then to throw away the apple. (I used a similar technique with Oreos, which involved eating the exposed icing from a deconstructed cookie and then throwing away the chocolate wafers.)

Still, I have fond memories of caramel apples, which I associate with the Halloween season and with getting money from the tooth fairy in exchange for my caramel-dislodged teeth.

So imagine my nostalgic glee when I found a perfectly-shaped, whimsically-decorated caramel apple at my local Ralph’s grocery store. (Ralph’s is part of the same parent company as Kroger and Raley’s, so I suspect you can find this same confection near you.) On to the review!

1. Packaging. This caramel apple came on a black plastic tray, and was covered with a clear plastic domed lid. (For some reason, my photo of the domed lid didn’t turn out. Just take my word for this). Now, even though there’s no real Halloween theme to the packaging, I’m going to continue my practice of awarding 2 points for the honesty and transparency of letting the potential consumer see the actual treat through the clear covering. Also, this was a well-designed and sturdy package, which protected the treat from getting damaged in transit.
2. Appearance of the Treat. Now this is what Halloween noshing is all about: a classic Halloween confection, with thick caramel coating, decorated with sprinkles, and topped with a friendly, rosy-cheeked ghost. And that ghost is not just a decoration; it’s a ring that you can wear to show your Halloween spirit. This is a first-class caramel apple. 3 points.

3. Taste. Oh. My. God. This is a down-home, classic, homemade, fresh, wondrous treat. In the words of Willy Wonka, it’s scrumdiddlyumptious. The caramel is rich and thick, with pronounced notes of brown sugar and butter. It’s just gooey enough to provide a pleasant mouthfeel, without being too chewy. The granny smith apple is simply perfect — crisp and slightly tart, to temper the sweet caramel coating. The proportion of candy to fruit is spot-on. Seriously, this is the best caramel apple I’ve ever tasted. I happily award it 3 points.

4. Value. Well they ain’t giving these things away. This set my back $3.99, otherwise known as about 4 bucks. But it’s got a net weight of half a pound. That works out to 50 cents per ounce, which surely is a good value. It’s fresh, hand-made, festively decorated, and delicious. 3 points.

Steve’s Sweetoberfest Score: 11 out of 12 points. A definite TREAT! It’s tied with Melville’s monster marshmallow pop! I’m using a lot of exclamation points in this review!