2026 Oktoberfest Pretzels

Pretzel #13: Mythbusters

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Stepdad’s in Sacramento, CA

You’ve met my friend Bill in these posts before. He’s the one with a 1941 Studebaker Commander that he discovered rotting away in a barn many years ago. I’m happy to report the car is now fully road-worthy and looking like a million bucks…which, as every owner of a classic car knows, eventually becomes the price of restoring and maintaining one. Anyway, here’s a clip of the beast on the road:

Bill and I regularly get together in Sacramento to do a little car work and then go out for a burger and a beer. And many times we would go to a place near his house called “Dad’s Kitchen.” Dad’s was known for its comfort food, including a disgustingly-indulgent “Dad’s Burger” that was featured on Drive-In, Diners, and Dives. Checkitout:

Anyway, now that I’ve pumped the place up, it’s my sad duty to report that it closed in 2024, after 14 wonderful years. And yet, in its stead, in the same building, there is now a new restaurant called “Stepdad’s.” So after a morning of adjusting brakes on the Commander, Bill and I recently went to check it the new place. And I, naturally, ordered their “Warm Pretzel.”

When the server brought me my pretzel, she proudly placed it in front of me and said “See? It looks like a frog’s face!” Like somehow that’s the gold standard for a pub pretzel. And then, using the unnaturally chirpy voice of a teacher showing a picture book to a three-year-old, she went on to point out the smile (in the form of a long crack along the lower part of the pretzel) and eyes (created by the two small containers of “English Cheddar Sauce” and Dijon mustard).

So sure, it’s a fun presentation. But haven’t we all learned by this point that a frog’s face does not guarantee a tasty pretzel? To be fair, the pretzel was baked perfectly and it had a good consistency. But somehow it was quite bland. It was lacking that perfect blend of flavors–maltiness, sweetness, maybe a little umami–that distinguishes a pretzel from a hunk of bread. And in a transparent effort to give this thing some flavor, they overdid the salt.

And then we come to strike three: The “English cheddar sauce.” They don’t even pretend to call it beer cheese. This is essentially a cheese-flavored dressing. It does not complement the pretzel. It’s just another sad attempt at making up for the pretzel’s lack of flavor.

Now, I should acknowledge that the rest of Stepdad’s food is actually quite good. I just think Stepdad’s, like so many restaurants, has fallen victim to the myth that a Bavarian pretzel is a simple dish to pull off. If this month’s blogs are able to bust that myth, they will have done their job.

Two stars.

Two MythBusters hosts holding pretzels in a workshop labeled MYTHBUSTERS

PRETZEL TRIVIA

I know absolutely nothing about modern video games. The last video game I spent any time playing was a Mac-based game called Dark Castle in 1986. It was considered a breakthrough game at the time…but let’s just say it hasn’t aged well. Here, take a look at the short video from actual gameplay:

But I bring this up because there’s a somewhat more modern game called Hitman 3. And rather than try to explain something I don’t understand, I’ll simply give you this excerpt from Wikipedia:

Hitman 3 is a 2021 stealth game developed and published by IO Interactive. … Concluding the story arc started in 2016’s Hitman, the game follows genetically engineered assassin Agent 47 and his allies as they hunt down the leaders of the secretive organization Providence, which controls global affairs and was partially responsible for 47’s creation and upbringing.

As with most games of this nature (I imagine), players get to use lots of weapons. And one of those weapons is, of course, a pretzel. Here’s an actual screenshot of Hitman’s pretzel:

According to the Hitman Wiki, “When thrown at an [non-player character’s] head, [the pretzel] will cause them to fall over, before standing up again.” So, just like in real life, you can’t kill someone with a pretzel, but you can knock them over. Just ask George W. Bush.

2026 Oktoberfest Pretzels

Pretzel #12: Where’s Waldo’s Pretzel?

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Out of Bounds Biergarten, Folsom, CA

Last night I attended an Oktoberfest party thrown by friends Vic and Peg. They had some awesome, giant pretzels that seemed perfect for today’s review:

What? Doesn’t everyone where Lederhosen to Oktoberfest?

But to my surprise, the pretzels were plastic, inflatable props. Turns out they were for a ring-toss game that involved toilet plungers. I am not making this up.

So let me instead offer a review of a real pretzel I had earlier this summer. I was at Out of Bounds Biergarten with my brother-in-law Scott S, who truly understands and appreciates this pretzel project.

Out of Bounds used to be a local brewery, but now it’s a taproom, serving pub food and other breweries’ beers. They have something like 25 taps going, so there’s bound to be a beer for everyone. It’s got a nice outdoor seating area (the eponymous Biergarten) and an attractive, rustic indoor space. There was a good, friendly crowd filling the indoor space but only a few people in the Biergarten. We opted for the latter, as pretzel reviewing requires a setting free of distractions.

I quickly got to work and ordered the Giant Soft Pretzel. This thing really is “giant”–in fact, it’s easily as big as the plastic one at Vic and Peg’s Oktoberfest. Out of Bounds also get points for hanging the pretzel on one of those fancy metal stands. This thing is a work of art.

More important even than presentation, this pretzel was positively delicious. It has what our server called a “thin crisp” consistency outside, which gives a slight crack when you bite into it. The inside of the pretzel is soft and chewy but not doughy. There’s a reasonable amount of salt (but it could have stood an extra shake or two from the saltshaker).

Accompanying the pretzel is what the menu calls a beer cheese “sauce,” that, brilliantly, includes chunks of real bacon. I could have eaten a bowl of the sauce with a spoon. But instead I just scooped up dollops of it with my pretzel. The pairing of the toasty, savory pretzel and the rich, robust sauce really worked; both the pretzel and the beer cheese sauce complemented each other in a beautiful display of symbiotic cooperation. Oh, they also gave us a container of honey mustard, but why waste your time?

Even though it was a huge pretzel, I was left wanting more when it was all gone. But that’s probably because Scott ate half of it.

I feel compelled to award this pretzel the full five stars. But I’ll also make another visit before the month is out, just to ensure I’m not falling victim to the Mariann’s Phenomenon.

PRETZEL TRIVIA

For today’s pretzel trivia, we are pleased to share a contribution from loyal reader Peter D. Taking us up on our plea for pretzel-related art, Peter shared a Renaissance-era Dutch painting by Pieter Bruegel. It’s called “The Fight Between Carnival and Lent,” and it contains over 200 figures that depict the push-and-pull between the excesses of Carnival and the self-restraint of Lent. It’s essentially a 16th-century Where’s Waldo scene, since Peter promised there are pretzels hidden within the scene.

I draw your attention to the red cart at the bottom of the painting. Upon it is seated a figure that personifies Lent, and there, at her feet, are two of those weird Flemish pretzels I was complaining about yesterday. Check it out:

Before closing, let me redirect you attention to the photo of the full painting. Note the Lent is about to collide with a fat man seated on a beer barrel. This guy personifies Carnival. Am I wrong to consider this a piscine confrontation between the herrings on Lent’s oar-like peel and Carnival’s prodigious cod-piece?

2026 Oktoberfest Pretzels

Pretzel #11: As-salt-ed

steveboilard5 Comments

South of North Brewing Company, South Lake Tahoe, CA

Every summer my friend Bruce spends a week with his father at a “music camp” on the eastern shore of Lake Tahoe. Bruce’s dad is now in his mid-90’s, and he’s been coming up here for years and years to play his violin with a bunch of young kids. I admire his commitment! But the other benefit is that every year I make a day trip up there to meet Bruce and we get a beer at a wonderful place called South of North Brewing Company. (An earlier blog post about SONBC is here.) I still don’t quite understand the meaning of the name, though surely it connects to “South Lake Tahoe” somehow.

This, my friends, is an ideal setting for a beer and a bite. It has a spacious outdoor seating area under leafy trees, games like the ubiquitous cornhole that admittedly no one actually ever plays, live music many nights of the week, and an ultra-relaxed vibe. They brew their own beer, and they make it with water from the lake itself. Drink Tahoe Brew indeed.

So anyway, as per tradition, I met Bruce in Tahoe and we had lunch at South of North. And this time I got their pretzel, which the menu describes as “Locally made Bavarian pretzel salted and served with housemade beer cheese, whole grain mustard and pickles.” So, the pretzel is locally made, while the beer cheese is house made. I take this to mean they make their own beer cheese but not their own pretzels. I’m beginning to think that pretzels are a specialty item that are beyond the capability of most brewpub kitchens. Anyway, moving on.

Let me state for the record that I was prepared to love this pretzel. The place is so relaxed and friendly and lovely that it instantly puts me into a positive mood. It’s the kind of setting where you feel “The lark’s on the wing/The snail’s on the thorn/God’s in his heaven/All’s right with the world!”

And yet. This pretzel does not match the promise conveyed by the setting. First, the dough itself is boring. It seems like it might be wheat flour. In any event, visually it lacks the characteristic cracking and when you bite into it you just get a mouthful of bread. What’s more, it seems to have not to have encountered even a whiff of baking soda.

Second, this pretzel has a ridiculous amount of salt. Just look at the picture! Even I, who reflexively adds salt to potato chips, had to brush at least half the salt from this pretzel. Had I not made this effort, I think my cell walls would have been irreversibly erupting. I mean, the surface is literally more salt than pretzel.

Third, the size of this pretzel was inexcusably skimpy. It’s $19, for God’s sake. I hate to think what that translates into as dollars per ounce. Here in California, I could have bought a full two gallons of gas for $19.

The one bright spot was the beer cheese. It was positively amazing. It tasted both cheddary and beery. And, as we’ve discussed, it’s made at the brewery itself. My only complaint is that there was not enough, even for a small pretzel like this. They do also give you some stoneground mustard, which is fine. But rather than providing it in a handy little cup, as they do with the beer cheese, the mustard is just squirted haphazardly onto the serving tray, conveying, I believe, disdain for the patron. Now, there are some pickle slices, but these seem like an odd condiment for a pretzel.

Overall this pretzel seems to be poorly conceived and poorly executed and overpriced. Other than that, it’s a winner. Two stars.

PRETZEL TRIVIA

In 1615, Flemish artist Clara Peeters (sic) painted a “Still Life with Cheeses, Almonds and Pretzels.” Now, I’m going to let the lack of Oxford comma pass without my much-justified outrage, but I am going to take issue with the so-called “pretzels.” I mean, just look at this painting:

Let’s zero in on the offending image:

If she’d titled her piece “Still Life with Cheeses, Almonds, and Brown Links of Chain” I wouldn’t have a problem. She even could have called it “Still Life with Cheeses, Almonds, Some Ruffles Potato Chips, a Jug of Something, and Some Odd, Tangled Breadsticks Entirely Devoid of Salt” and I wouldn’t object. But pretzels? I think not. I invite my loyal readers to send me some worthy pretzel art. These 17th-century Flemish painters just aren’t cutting it.

2026 Oktoberfest Pretzels

Pretzel #10–Perilous Pretzels

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Oak Park Brewing Company, Sacramento, CA

Years ago I worked for a nonpartisan state legislative agency. We had no formal authority or powers; our role was simply to analyze state budget issues and provide advice and information to the state Legislature. This, for me, was the ideal job. I got to indulge my analytical side, and even to make recommendations for state programs and taxes and expenditures. But, because the Legislature was free to take or leave our recommendations as they saw fit, we were not held responsible for any specific actions. It was the best of both worlds: practical academic research plus meaningful policy relevance, without political consequences. Who could ask for more?

After almost 15 years I left this job, but I’ve kept in touch with a group of former colleagues (now almost all retired) from that office. We get together periodically, ostensibly to discuss grammatical issues (I’m not making this up), but the conversation generally veers toward lumbago and bursitis. Anyway, we got together last night at Oak Park Brewing Company for a tardy celebration of Zweibelmas, which, if you’re not familiar with it, is not worth going into here. Suffice it to say that the main focus of our festivities was beer….and pretzels.

Oak Park Brewing Company is a vibrant, community-rooted brewery and restaurant on Broadway in Sacramento. It’s been around for a decade, and it’s housed in a distinctive and atmospheric century-old building. It’s definitely one of the bright spots on Broadway, and one of my favorite places to hang out.

So amid all the hullabaloo of our festivities I managed to try their OPB Pretzel: “LARGE BUTTERY SOFT BAKED PRETZEL, HOUSEMADE BEER CHEESES & CREOLE MUSTARD.” Now, this description raises a few questions. Like, is “buttery” just a descriptor for how “soft” it is (“buttery-soft”), or do they mean that it’s not only soft, but it’s also buttery (as in, brushed with butter)? Meanwhile, why the plural usage in reference to the beer “cheeses”? And finally, why is the entire description in capital letters?

Throwing caution to the wind, I ordered myself an OPB Pretzel. And I was not disappointed.

Is it just me, or do you also see Kermit the Frog?

This pretzel has a lot going for it. I mean, just look at the size! And it’s obviously handmade, with varying thickness throughout. And you can see in the cracks how the dough is chewy versus fluffy. Salt distribution is ideal. And we can see why they chose to use the plural of beer cheese, since they provide two containers.

The taste doesn’t disappoint either. It’s chewy but not too heavy. It actually almost melts in your mouth (“buttery-soft”). I don’t taste a heavy brushing of butter, though, and I consider that a good thing. The beer cheese is also mighty tasty; it’s quite cheddary…but I don’t taste any trace of beer. This is my only complaint. Otherwise, it’s close to the Perfect Pretzel.

I actually relayed my compliments to our server, and asked if these were made in-house. She kind of scoffed, and said “no,” as in “obviously not, you rube.” Then she added, apropos of nothing, “but we make our own beer.” I asked who made the pretzels, and she just shrugged. “No idea.”

This interaction triggers two thoughts: (1) did I breach etiquette somehow by asking if they made their pretzels? She sure seemed to be annoyed by the question. And (2) have any of the other pretzels I’ve reviewed been house-made? I was assuming they all were, but aside from B’More Twist, where they make the pretzels in front of you, I actually don’t know. Is this even important?

I’ll give the pretzel 4 stars. It’s close to a five in terms of taste and appearance, but half a point comes off for the server’s ‘tude and half off for sourcing it from parts unknown.

PRETZEL TRIVIA

For today’s pretzel trivia let’s consider the world of pretzel-related injuries. Surely you remember in January 2002, when the President of the United States, George W. Bush, was watching a football game on TV and somehow choked on the pretzel he was munching. According to the Los Angeles Times, a bite of pretzel went down the presidential windpipe, which caused “a nerve [to be] stimulated by the pretzel caught in his throat. The medical term for such an episode is vasovagal syncope… In such cases, the body sends a signal to the heart via the vagus nerve. This causes a sudden drop in heart rate, which is restored when the person falls.” After fainting, Bush fell off the couch, “bruising his lower lip and suffering an abrasion the size of a half dollar on his left cheek, White House physician Dr. Richard Tubb said.”

Sure, you think pretzels are all fun and games….until the president almost puts out his eye because of one.

But I’m sure every schoolchild knows all this. The trivia is: Where did the pretzel come from? Apparently for over a decade the source of the pretzel was a national secret. But in 2014 intrepid reporters were able to determine that The Pretzel That Almost Took Down the President came from Hammond Pretzel Bakery in Lancaster, PA. Let that be a warning to you all.

2026 Oktoberfest Pretzels

Pretzel #9–Guest blog!

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Editor’s Note: While I’m off celebrating National Leif Erikson Day, we bring you a guest post from long-time reader Victor R.

SO IT’S ROOT, ROOT, ROOT FOR THE HOME TEAM’S PRETZEL

Loyal readers of this blog know that pretzels are available in a variety of locations, including restaurants, brew pubs and food trucks. However, an underappreciated venue for picking up a quality pretzel is your neighborhood sports stadium. Many stadiums offer pretzels at their concession stands, allowing you to enjoy a fine meal while watching a live sporting event, adding an extra dimension to the experience of consuming dough and, of course, an overpriced beer.

Those of you who are fans of the San Francisco Giants may have had the experience of enjoying a truly great pretzel at Oracle Park, which is the home of the Giants. Oracle’s pretzels are very good, meeting all of the quality requirements that one could apply to a pretzel (perfect salt distribution, golden brown color, crispy outside, excellent taste). If you want to enjoy a pretzel during a Giants game in April, all you have to do is head to the ballpark, buy a (pricey) ticket to the game, stand in line at a concession stand, and you’re all set! However, if you want a Giants pretzel and the calendar says it’s October, you know you’re out of luck, because the Giants never play baseball in October (the only Major League teams still playing in October are the good ones, which doesn’t include the Giants). (Editor’s Note: Please direct any hate mail to Vic, and not to this blog.)

Which brought me to UC Davis Health Stadium in Davis California to taste and evaluate the pretzels they serve while also watching the mighty Aggie football team (full disclosure—UCD is my alma mater) play those scoundrels from Eastern Washington University.

First off, the pretzel came in at only $6, which is very affordable. This pretzel is priced to ensure that poor students (along with tuition-paying parents of poor students, or poor
alumni) could afford a meal while at the game. In looking at the photo (above), you will notice the “non-traditional” pretzel “strips” shape, rather than simply using the typical twisted knot shape. I’m not an overly traditional person, but I have to say I prefer the traditional shape.

The color rates well, with the classic pretzel look, having a dark brown color, accented by the cracking, but there is no gloss (which made me wonder if the makers had skipped giving it the baking soda boiling treatment). And you will note that the salt distribution leaves a lot to be desired. The first strip has a generous application of salt (very good), but the other one is very lightly salted (not as good). And the presentation wasn’t the best—how about a paper liner for the tray it comes in?

Now that I’ve been (some would say) overly critical about the cosmetic stuff, let’s get to the most important feature of any pretzel—its taste. In the taste category, this pretzel delivers! It’s crispy on the outside, and soft and chewy on the inside, delivering a delicious fresh-baked taste. The accompanying beer cheese was not bad—while I didn’t get any hint of beer in the flavor, it did have a sharp cheddar taste and even delivered a little heat. Mustard was not included with the primary pretzel package that came at the concession stand, so that had to be picked up separately (standard procedure for any stadium food). However, the only available mustard was a squeeze jar of standard French’s mustard, with no options for Dijon or other more exotic mustards.

Overall, while not quite up to the Oracle Park pretzel standard, this was a tasty, surprisingly good (and much more affordable) pretzel. On our standard 5-star grading scale, taste and affordability require that I give this pretzel 4 out of 5 possible points!

And (because I know you want to know), the Aggies did take care of business and beat those dastardly Eastern Washington University Eagles, which made this, already very good pretzel taste even better!